Oh Lord!!

Woman, unborn child, and adorable dog NEARLY perish in condo fire

2010-12-12T01:50:00.000-08:00

First things first, we are all fine. But tonight has been very exciting!

At approximately 12:07 I was awoken by our high-pitched alarm. It took me what felt like a few minutes to realize the alarm I heard was not someone breaking in, we don't have a security alarm but for whatever reason that wasn't registering, but the fire alarm. (I have a very strange fear of someone breaking into my condo whenever Bryan is out of town. This fear is so real I feel it necessary to lock the doors from the garage to the office, the office to the stairs, double lock the front door and finally my bedroom door. Basically, if it has a lock it gets locked. Before we took to shacking up I lived alone for years. On an occasion or two in my downtown apartment I was so unconcerned, or lets face it tipsy, about a break in that I accidentally left the keys in my front door. One time a Good Samaritan neighbor felt inclined to help me by opening my front door and dropping my keys inside while I slept. I heard the door open and screamed. Terrifying. My nice neighbor is lucky of 2 things 1. this is WA and not a big time NRA state 2. I wouldn't be keeping a gun anyways. None the less, my concern of a real break has been strongest at 2 points in my life. 1. As a child, at which time I made my sister Kelly sleep by the window in the room we shared assuming that if a kidnapper came through the window he would snatch the more child. Sorry Kelly! 2. Now as a married adult living in a townhouse in the burbs)

So I went ahead and called 911 while running around my room trying to find something to wear outside. Typically, I have an assortment of clothes on my floor to choose from. Unfortunately I was very productive today and my room is quite tidy. This, apparently, is very inconvenient should you need to escape your home, for any number of reasons, in the middle of the night. From here on I plan to have a set of "escape clothes" prepared on a shelf that are readily accessible in the middle of the night.

Let me tell you about my experience with 911. First of all the nice lady on the phone is now more than likely deaf. Once I found my escape clothes, I ran downstairs with Sofie in my arms. I tried going out the front door and I swear I saw a person lurking about! I shrieked in the poor lady's ear in terror. They are probably going to use my recorded call as a training video as I am sure I made very little sense to my poor emergency dispatcher. I distinctly remember telling her repeatedly that the fire alarm was going off, I didn't know where the fire was coming from, and that I was positive someone was attempting to lure me out of my home. To a rational and now deaf emergency dispatcher, I am sure that train of logic makes very little sense and her expert coaching and coercion that I should get out of the house that may be on fire will probably need to be studied by other dispatchers. Now, that all being said, I know my heroine is now at least partially deaf. I know this because although she was helpfully in getting me out of the house, she struggled figuring out where I live....

"What city?"

"Bothell"

"I'm sorry?"

"Bothell"

"Are you sure you live in Bothell, that street address isn't coming up in Bothell"

"Yes, right on the line between Bothell and Millcreek, but sadly yes, I live in Bothell"

"Bothell in Snohomish County?"

"YES! That Bothell!"

"Hmmmm, are you sure?"

So finally she got the fire department dispatched me, my unborn child, and sweet little dog out of our house and out into the cold rainy night. Most of my neighbors were also outdoors at this point. In fact, it seems they had been outdoors for sometime. Apparently they weren't paralyzed by a fear of a killer outside their front doors. Good for them! Upon coming to the final realization that I was not going to be attacked, I noticed that 2 doors down my sweet neighbors looked especially frantic and that their fire sprinkler system was going off. Apparently they were having a poker holiday party in their garage and a space heater had caused this most unfortunate circumstance.

So at this point I try to phone my dear sweet husband. I called him 3 times. Does he answer? No. So I text him that the alarm to our building is going off, but we are all fine. His response, "At Bar". Uhhhhh, thanks for the concern. Your family was, mere moments ago, in grave danger and upon learning that we nearly died but are okay you have made it abundantly apparent that we may be requiring an intervention or at the least a discussion of priorities. Kidding, but honestly, next time I nearly die I hope Bryan asks firsts, "are you sure you are okay?" before announcing he is boozing with his friends.

So now, after an exciting hour, I am back in my bed. And yes, I relocked all of my doors! Night night all!

Criminal Mastermind

2010-04-07T21:37:00.000-07:00

So as I was driving home yesterday all sorts of lights on my dash started going off and my car did this real strange lurching thing and made some noises. Well, I'm no auto repairman, but I know enough to know when things like this happen to one's auto, one needs to get their auto to a shop. Thankfully, I do not own this POS Ford. My company owns this ford and they allow me, foolishly perhaps, to drive it an extraordinary amount of miles every day. So to remedy the situation I just called up my company and they arranged an auto service and rental car.

So this morning I drove my feeble vehicle to the dealership and was met by a lovely person from enterprise. First statement from the enterprise driver, I'm just going to need to see your license.... oh right, that. Well, I lost my license a few weeks ago.... I know, I know Bryan already explained its illegal to drive without a license. But trust me, when you get pulled over, not having a license on you is really the least of your problems, I'm an expert when it comes to these types of driving without a license scenarios.

So back to the story. Since enterprise wouldn't just take my word that I am a legal driver the Ford dealership drove me home. Upon arriving at our home it hit me that I had forgotten my keys in the car and I was locked out of the house.

Thankfully, this is another area of expertise for me, breaking and entering my home. After a few minutes it hit me that I could pop off the screen to a window, open said window from the outside by applying just the right amount of upward pressure, reach in to my home and unlock the door from the inside! VOILA! I'm in!

It worked. Upon breaking and entering I was able to order a new license that is being shipped to an apartment I lived in over 2 years ago because you have to go into the DMV if you are changing an address, which you are supposed to do within a month of moving. Details. The point being, the temporary license will allow me to pick up a car from enterprise!

All in all, I broke quite a few laws today, shame on me... Hopefully tomorrow will go much more smoothly!

Our vacuum sucks

2010-04-04T21:46:00.000-07:00

I am boycotting vacuuming. Ever since those Kirby men came over I just can't bring myself to use our dumb eureka. Our eureka doesn't suck stuff up or leave those gorgeous vacuum lines in the carpet. So I'm not even bothering.

Bryan finally noticed my lack of interest in my former activity. When I explained my dissatisfaction he suggested that perhaps the vacuum needed a new air filter. Apparently, the air filter has never been changed in 8 years. So off he went to Lowe's with the goal of purchasing a new air filter so we could clean the house. He returned with this:

Ummmm. What does he expect me to do with this?

Apparently the filter was $20. This lil car cleaning beauty was $45.99. HILARIOUS! Boy logic is very strange.

Sun Valley!

2010-03-23T02:08:00.000-07:00

Alright, I told you, you were going to be jealous of my February! Here is our last trip for February....Sun Valley Idaho!

The last weekend of February we gathered up our ski clothes, put Sofie in a bag and snuck her on a plane (seriously, Alaska Airlines wants to charge us 100 bucks each way to fly our 4 lb puppy, yeah... no thanks), and flew to Idaho. We spent 3 days skiing, eating, and laughing! The trip was an ABSOLUTE success.

On Friday night, after a very full day on the hill, we went to Pioneer Restaurant for dinner. This steakhouse is a tradition of my family, not sure why, it just is. Bryan was "challenged" by my uncles to go for the Pioneer Cut of meat. The pioneer cut is 32 oz, thats 2 lbs of cow flesh! And let me just say, Bryan is not in training for this sort of meat eating experience. I like my proteins, all sorts at most meals. Bryan is the one in our family who suggests that we don't need to eat meat at each meal, or even, gasp, each day. So I was highly amused when he agreed to take on the Pio Cut. Sick...

Somewhat surprisingly, Bryan managed to make it through the entire slab of flesh. He spent the next three days feeling a bit ill, but quite pleased with himself for rising to the challenge. I spent the next 3 days feeling guilty, typically I purchase .5 lbs of meat for the 2 of us, I guess I have been shorting my poor husband and his love of cow flesh!

Saturday, following skiing and Bryan's partial recovery from his meat coma, we took Bryan, Daniel and Blair (Kourtney's sweet friend) over to the Sun Valley Lodge.

Obviously, this excursion speaks for itself!

A major outcome of this vacation is my family's new swear word. It has occurred to us that swear words seem to be losing meaning and impact in todays society. So we have come up with a new word that is taboo, if you will. This word is so naughty, I feel bad just typing it out and I urge you to please use this word sparingly. This new swear word is, lolyloopin! An acceptable use of the word, for example, occurred when sweet Blair fell skiing, BADLY bruising her hip. My dear father was concerned, but assuaged all of concerns. He explained that he and Blair would spend Sunday cleaning the condo and keeping each other comfortable. Right. Good. Excellent. Poor Dad, 3 daughters and has never once caught a break!

So, that's February, told you it was a really fun and busy month! We had a fantastic time with Grammy and our Levy family in Sun valley! It was super special to be with everyone and a great way to wrap up our fun month of celebrations and travel!

Olympics Round Two

2010-03-21T21:04:00.000-07:00

Bryan and I had such an amazing time in Vancouver with everyone that we decided we should go back for Bryan's birthday! This time, just the two of us.

Its such a small world, we ran into some familiar Seattle faces, completely unplanned!

We also made some new canadian friends and met up with my old friend Brett

Needless to say, we just couldn't get enough of the Olympics!

Olympic Spirit!

2010-03-21T15:36:00.000-07:00

Ok, I'm a bit behind. We went to Tahoe and went skiing for Valentines day. It was fantastic! The best part is that we got to fly there. I love our road trips, but sometimes 14 hours gets a bit long...
While watching the FABULOUS opening games on TV in Tahoe it occurred to me that we could NOT miss out on the fun. Vancouver is only 120 miles from our house and it just makes no sense to be so close and not drive up! So I popped onto criagslist and found a 2 bedroom ghetto-fab condo for rent for just 300 hundred smackeroos! Olympics, here we come!
We drove up with our dear friends Travis and Dan. LeighAnn, Lindsey and our friend Emma also came up for the day. We didn't see any events, but we had so much fun seeing the crowds of people, walking in the streets and watching events in bars with people from all over the world!

We walked into the Olympics from our condo

Look at all the people!!!

Finding these mittens was a MAJOR accomplishment! Aren't they so cute?

This lady spotted Sofie and I when we were packing up. She thought Sofie was so sweet and she asked to take Sof's picture and put her in a magazine. Sofie and I are both used to this sort of attention, so we naturally agreed. Although the editor thought Sof would make a lovely ice dancer, I personally think she would excel at ski-cross!

(click here) for the piece on Midget.

The Rings!!!

The Flame!

Back in the USA!

Manic Blogging Ends Here

2010-03-03T22:01:00.000-08:00

Just to stay accountable, I told Bryan about all his gifts before his birthday! Oops. When we were out in Canada I asked if he wanted to know, of course he said no. So I went ahead and told him anyways!

More to come on fabulous February later :-)

Wishful Wednesday... I'm a sucker for all things Olympic!

2010-03-03T21:52:00.000-08:00

This week Kels posed the question: What Olympic event do you wish you could have attended?
SO MANY! My favorite event on TV was ski cross! But if I could have attended any event I think it would have to be the Gold medal men's hockey game! USA vs Canada!
Bryan and I did cross the border, twice, to get the spirit of the Olympics! And it was amazing! I can only imagine how excited the city of Vancouver must have been when they won the Gold in Men's Hockey!

The Party Continues With a Little Self Expression!

2010-03-03T21:40:00.000-08:00

Our party continued when my sweet friend Erin and her boyfriend arrived in Seattle. Erin is a wonderful, sweet, loud, passionate, exciting friend! She always finds “different” activities and she invited Bryan and me to join her and her Bryan for an evening at The Can Can!

We had wanted to go to The Can Can which is a Seattle bar In Pike’s Place that also happens to have a mild-ish burlesque show. Now, while I describe The Can Can as burlesque, Bryan calls it self expression entertainment. We will have to agree to disagree. This blog is self expression! The Can Can is a dark, prohibition styled, serving absinthe bar with elaborately clad (or not clad) dancers performing on a stage! WE LOVED IT! It was SUPER fun to catch up with Erin and Bryan and we also enjoyed the Seattlesque environment of The Can Can.

Near the beginning of the show, Bryan looked at me and announced, “we should bring my parents here, they would really enjoy this.” And the next thing I saw was a lovely lady on a ladder in pasties and tights! Ummm, maybe no to taking parents to The Can Can?!

The Happiest Place on Earth and San Diego!

2010-03-03T21:05:00.000-08:00

At the end of this series of blogs, I'm sure you will find, that you feel very very bad for Bryan and me. Our month of February was SUPER fun and we are EXHAUSTED now that it is March.

The party, at least for me, began at the end of January when Uncle Chuck (not a real uncle, my employer) sent us on down to Anaheim for a meeting. I am lucky enough to work with my cuzzy and buddy, LeighAnn, and we honestly had no intentions of visiting the Happiest Place on Earth. But, as can be expected, the pull of the magical matterhorn was too much and when our meeting ended we cruised over to Downtown disney for many adult beverages and finally a trip into Disneyland!

At one point, perhaps after stumbling off of Pirates, I shrieked to LeighAnn, "I love this! Thank you so much for coming here with me! This makes me so so happy!" To which LeighAnn replied, "Kates, when you know something makes you happy, you should do it all the time!" Wise words, very wise words

From here one of my dearest friends Heather picked up her tipsy friend (me) and we traveled onto a weekend of fun at her home in San Diego! Heather became weary of the shape she would scoop me up in when I answered the phone and informed her I was kissing Mickey Mouse. Oh boy!

The trip was made extra special because I was also able to spend time with my friends Julia and Lindsey. We did lots of eating, went out in downtown San Diego, had a girls' brunch, tasted AMAZING wedding cake, and I even got to play some beer pong with Bryan's college friends!

It was during this game of beer pong that Julia, Cynthia and I found out we are "WOO" girls. Ugh. Sad day. Do you know what a "WOO" girl is? A "WOO" girl is a girl that scream, "WOO" when something exciting happens. This can be exacerbated by the consumption of adult beverages.

Thank you everyone for a VERY fun weekend!

Wishful Wednesday... I'm playin, again!

2010-02-24T23:37:00.000-08:00

Well, this week Kelsey asked us to pick a character from a fictional novel that we would like to be! This was super hard for me because I LOVE to read and but typically go with historical fiction. Recently I read Sarah's Keys, which is about the holocaust and events in France, so clearly "Sarah" was out. But here's what I came up with...

1. On the one hand I would love to be Anne Boleyn from The Other Boleyn Girl because I think that it is such a fascinating time in history, and Henry was clearly a character, who would have been BEYOND interesting to know. But on the other hand, she lost her head and thats not too fantastic at all.
2. Nefertiti from Nefertiti. Her and her husband did all sort of wacky stuff in Egypt. They tried to change the religion, moved the capital, ignored their counsel.... crazy! And the royalty in Egypt wore all sorts of fun makeup and clothes and had "body servants" to get them ready, who knew? She also ended up as a Pharaoh!!

Accountability

2010-02-18T23:24:00.000-08:00

I love all things Olympic and tomorrow we are going! I'm super excited and I'm writing about it before it happens to keep me accountable to write about it after we do it!

Also, its Bryan's birthday on Monday. I am just AWFUL about keeping surprises. I really don't like to be surprised or to give surprises. Never have. At Christmas time I KNEW Bryan wanted a certain watch. For weeks I thought to myself, maybe I will surprise him with that watch. Could I do it? Noooooooo, of course not. The day I was going to the mall I excitedly announced, "hey! I'm going to the mall to get your Christmas gift, wanna know what it is?" Bryan, "No." Me, "It's that watch you want!" Shoot. Why do I do that!!!!

So today I purchased some birthday gifts for Bryan. I asked him if he wanted them today, and to my disappointment, he said no. So, I am going to do my best to keep the birthday surprises a surprise! I'm writing it down here to keep myself accountable.

The plumber's pipes!

2010-02-18T23:05:00.000-08:00

I spend my days with Psychiatrists and psychiatric patients. There are many things I love about the psychiatric specialty, I shall share some of my favorites with you

1. Psychiatry is a pretty good fit for me as I am a self diagnosed hypochondriac and learning about psychiatric illnesses has allowed me the ability to self diagnose a vast array of illnesses in not only myself, but others. No longer do I have to search for small physical ailments to manifest into major illnesses. I can wash my hands and think OCD, choose to stay in my jammies all weekend with an episode of depression, look back on my college years and justify actions with a diagnosis of borderline personality, procrastinate on chores because of my adult ADHD! This awareness of mental illness has opened many doors to brush off responsibility for my actions. After all, I'm practically a doctor!

2. Many people with severe psychiatric illness have lost their ability to censor or edit things they say. It's common place to be shouted at across a crowded waiting room, "pretty lady" or "nice legs". Now, I understand you may think I'm a bit "off" for appreciating men who have forgone bathing to shout such things at me. But I like to think that because these nice people don't have the ability to censor, that everyone is thinking this about me, they just know they shouldn't shout it out.

3. The patients tell interesting stories.

Sometimes the stories aren't real. My favorite patient for the past 2 years is a man named "John", at least thats what I thought. "John" spends quite a bit of time in the community mental health drop in center ( a place people can spend time in getting training, meals, counseling services). But he always is courteous, opens the door for me, asks me how I'm doing. I feel like we have developed a friendship over the past 2 years. Well, for about a month I hadn't seen "John" so I asked the clinic where he was. They case manager looked at me very puzzled, so I said "You know, longish brown hair, always wears a yellow wind breaker." At this point it was explained to me that "John" has religious delusions, his name is actually Bill, but he changes his name regularly to that of someone from the bible..... obviously! :-)

Sometimes the stories are very real, and they can be sad. Mental illness often hits people right as they are beginning their adult lives. It is very common to hear stories of men who were first diagnosed in college with illnesses like schizophrenia and how their lives change from planning for a future with a wife or making plans to get a job to struggling to fit in at all and often times without support or housing. When I hear these stories I feel so thankful for my mental health and for that of my family.

4. Okay, back to light, that got a little heavy for a second.... The Psychs are often as crazy as patients! You have, of course, heard of the plumber whose pipes are leaking. Well psychiatrists, in general, are no different!

Just yesterday I was conversing with a Dr. who interrupted me, "Excuse me, I need to use the head" he proceeded to get up from his desk and go around the corner, to what I hope was a restroom, and urinate. All the while he continued to talk to me. Odd.

Another psych, who was sticking his tongue out like a lizard for the 20 minutes we spoke, took my bag from me, stared at as if he had never seen a lady's bag, and then began removing its contents. Out came my sunglasses which he seemed puzzled by. Then my wallet. Then a box of samples. Then one bottle of pills,
he commented "hmmm I need these. These (the pill bottle) are little ones."
I said he could have them.
"Just one box?" he replied.
I said, "yes, there are 6 patient starters in there."
He looked back and said, "6? good. 6 is what I needed."
It seemed as if this entire encounter was going completely unregistered to my sweet, bag riffling, lizard licking psychiatrist. And you may be asking yourself, "why didn't she confiscate her bag from this man?" In all honesty, I don't know. I was just so curious that this man would take my personal belongings and begin shuffling through them as if he had every right to examine the contents.

All in all, I love the specialty of the physicians I work with. Sometimes strange, sometimes touching, sometimes comical. But I think I am a very lucky girl to have this job that brings me to this always entertaining group!

Sof does tricks for dog crack!

2010-01-06T22:08:00.000-08:00

Well, it's definitely been confirmed, Bryan and I are not ready for real babies.

Usually when we go to Tahoe there are lots of dogs.

Sofie

Izzy

Riley

Fritz

and sweet Haden, whom I can't find a picture of...

Because of all these dogs, food has historically been left out, allowing the wonderful dogs to graze freely. Our dogs, unlike their owners, have self control and know to stop eating when they aren't hungry. Well, at New Years only Sof and Izzy were in attendance. Poor sweet Sofie's parents just went ahead and assumed there was dog food out. Idiots. On day 2 of the festivities we noticed that Sofie was willing to do ANYTHING for these chicken dog treats. I began to refer to my sweet little maltese as a crack baby. She learned to roll over in about 5 minutes because she wanted her crack so badly. And trust me when I say, typically Sofie is not too bright or highly motivated by food!

Well, we didn't put 2 and 2 together until day 3 when Bryan looked at me and said, "have we been feeding Sofie?" I thought back to the day before when my poor practice child acted like a feining crack addict over the dog treats, and it dawned on me, she hadn't eaten in 3 days! The poor little thing only weighs 4.6 lbs! She has no extra weight to loose! BAD PARENTS! No wonder she kept rolling over and acting crazy, she hadn't been fed!

Clearly, at this point, we cannot be trusted with a real baby. But on the bright side she quickly learned a new trick, which is absolutely adorable!

Still, we are so sorry to our little crack baby doggie!

Wishful Wednesday... I'm playin Kels!

2010-01-05T23:18:00.000-08:00

So my dear real life friend, Kelsey (sorry, dolly, I have know idea how to make a link back to your blog) does this cute "wishful wednesday" game. I decided to play along because the topic this week is haircuts and I'm cutting mine tomorrow! So I wish for a haircut that looks like this...

Not too much shorter than it is now, but the bangs will be exciting! Happy hair cutting!

Christmas! It came and went so quickly!

2010-01-05T21:52:00.000-08:00

The Christmas season came and went way to quickly!
We spent Christmas with the Lord's in Pennsylvania. We had an amazing time and it was really fun to see Grandma's house.

After Christmas we made a road trip to Tahoe for New Years. I think our new year's resolution is to give up driving to Tahoe. It is a realllllllllly long drive from Seattle!

Proof that it DID happen!

2009-12-15T20:44:00.000-08:00

After much debate, we purchased a beautiful artifical tree! I win :)

I am going to purchase a few more ornaments after Christmas and my sweet Gram is going to teach me to cross stitch so I man make our stockings for next year. But not bad for a start...

I don't like sunshine!

2009-12-15T20:12:00.000-08:00

Bryan and I lucked out when my parents won a cruise! They sell Aflac and BOTH won a cruise so Bryan and I got to be their lucky guests!

We departed Long Beach and sailed to Ensenada. As an excursion we played golf. Actually, they played, I enjoyed the views! We played lots of cards on the ship, Bryan and I emerged as the champions! We also ate and drank a ton! I am not so sure about people that rave about the food on cruises, it was a bit like spending 3 days at a floating Sizzler... Still quite fun and I'm not gonna lie, I ordered my 2 appetizers and entrees :-) Little girl, big eater. We also took my dear friend Mollie's advice and smuggled alcohol on to the ship. Before departing Long Beach the 4 of us took a field trip to bevmo! We purchased 4 bottles of champagne, 1 Malibu, 1 vodka and 1 crown and smuggled it onto the ship in pedialyte bottles. Who is going to argue with a family taking care of their very ill baby? Now, it's a good thing we docked after 16 hours on the ship, because we were out of beverage makings! (Don't worry, we were sharing with a few other people) So as we came back aboard from Mexico we purchased more alcohol and I stuffed it into my pants and threw on Bryan's jacket. Just as no one is going to argue with the parents of a sick baby, no one is going to fight with a lady who appears pregnant ;-)

It was a fantastic trip! We had lots of great laughs and are so thankful to Mom and Big Daddy for inviting us! We love you both!!!

Sales school and we live in filth!

2009-12-15T19:43:00.000-08:00

Last week Bryan and I were watching the season finale of The Biggest Loser at 9:30 pm when we received a knock on our door. Bryan is the president of our HOA and this neighborhood has some issues, to put it mildly, so I figured it was going to be one of our neighbors coming over to complain and spread the spirit of this joyous season. AKA, I made him get up and answer the door. I was wrong... it was actually two young ladies inquiring as to whether the "lady of the house" would like HER carpets cleaned and stairs vacuumed for "FREE", this will only take 10 minutes they promised. Well, yes! The "lady of the house" would LOVE the carpets cleaned and stairs vacuumed for free! Please, please, do come in!

Shoot. We should have known this was too good to be true!! In walked two young men, Camron and RJ, ready to clean our carpets and sell us a Kirby! Camron came upstairs with us and began demonstrating the Kirby. He vacuumed our whole room, and as he cleaned he showed us what he was vacuuming up with his little demo circles. Disgusting filth...

He asked us how regularly we vacuum and we had to admit, as we cracked up, that our vacuuming was infrequent at best. Camron exclaimed, "Why would you!?" Your vacuum wouldn't work this well, it would be a waste of time...." Sure Camron, that’s why I choose not to vacuum more frequently, it's because my vacuum doesn't work that well. It surely has nothing to do with the fact that vacuuming is one of my least favorite household chores!
While Camron cleaned away he kept checking in, trial closing us, and trying to seal the deal. He was very aggressive, and yet for some reason, we didn't mind this stranger cleaning our home while we sat watching and drinking our beers. Bryan did an excellent job throwing objection after objection so that Camron would continue to demonstrate the functionality of the Kirby. All said and done, Camron vacuumed and shampooed my entire upstairs and stair case, cleaned our mattress making it free of dust-mites, the hardwoods were cleaned and polished in the kitchen, AND I was offered a massage by Camron and his Kirby.
While this was going on I giggled and looked to Bryan, my big strong man, to make a decision. When Camron pulled out the paperwork and tried to get Bryan to sign, I hid in the kitchen, unable to say "no". Bryan made fun of me that if he hadn't been there, I probably would have purchased 2 Kirbys. 2 is certainly an exaggeration, 1 is closer to the truth.
So at midnight, after some very impressive selling, we finally got the poor sad salesmen out of our clean home. They tried to close us by talking the Kirby and our health, overall cost of home ownership, the ability to use the Kirby in all sorts of functions, guilt over Camron winning a cruise.... All of which were quite compelling reasons to purchase! So as they were leaving, all 4 of us were a bit baffled as to why we didn't purchase this amazing Kirby. They did everything right. We see all the VALUE in owning a Kirby. We see the NEED. We believe in its BENEFITS over the competitors. The answer, we just didn’t wake up thinking, "today is the day we are gonna blow 1500 smackers on a vacuum!"

Kindle vs Sony Reader

2009-11-08T18:48:00.001-08:00

I am thinking I want one of these handy reading devices. If my techie husband were here, I'd ask him. But I know there are some readers out there that also are up to date on tech things! Anyone have anything to say about the Kindle or the Sony Reader?

Fat Wife Hits An All Time Low

2009-11-08T10:11:00.000-08:00

We don't get tricker treaters at our condo so I didn't buy any bags in bulk filled with candy this halloween. Inevitably, it would have been me consuming the entire bag. But cuzzy, LeighAnn, did get trick or treaters and she did bring the leftovers to work on Friday. Somehow, I ended up bringing home a bunch of it. Mostly Laffy Taffy, but a few select snickers.
I decided Saturday morning that I had consumed, please notice the word selection of "consumed" vs. "enjoyed", more than my fair share and I tossed the candy into the trash can. Bryan emptied the trash down to the garbage in the garage while we were participating in the Saturday morning cleaning hour.
Well, Saturday night came and we enjoyed some wine while I dominated Bryan in a game of crowns. At this point regret sat in! I begged Bryan to retrieve the candy from the big garbage and he said no. It really was like a scene out of "Gone Too Far" with DJ AM, a show about drug addicts going to rehab. The look on his face was disgust and fear when I explained that we HAD to retrieve the candy, I was about to experience withdrawal symptoms. We should also be thankful that we are talking willy wonka's treats and not heroin because it turns out Bryan is an enabler! Although he wouldn't get me the candy, he did agree to hold the garbage can so I wouldn't fall in.
I consumed enough candy that Bryan informed me I smelt like a vending machine. My fatal flaw was placing the candy, still wrapped, into the garbage and not more permanently destroying the candy with the disposal or perhaps unwrapping and saturating with soap!

Good News!

2009-11-04T21:15:00.000-08:00

Good news if you happen to own Pfizer stock! You will be happy to know we have scaled WAAAAAAAAAAAY back…

Last week the Psychiatry sales division traveled back to Tarrytown, NY to learn about a new med we will be promoting. LeighAnn, my dear friend, cousin, and teammate and I booked our flights and traveled back east together for training.
We arrived at our hotel at 1:45 am, which was really fine because we are west coasters, after an hour long car trip from Newark. Max, the very friendly front desk manager at the Tarrytown Marriot, informed us he had some bad news, “Girls, your roommates have not yet arrived and we only have King size beds left.”Us, “So since there are not double rooms we get to room alone?!” (cheering and jumping up and down)
Max, “Uhhhh, no. But we can send up a rollaway for your rooms.”
Us. “We’re sorry but you are going to put us in rooms, with people we don’t know, in the middle of the night, with one bed and a rollaway?”
Now I’m thinking to myself, what is the protocol on this? Imagine yourself, an adult, working at a very large company, that requires adult strangers to share rooms. Now imagine that you have been informed that there will be one bed and some sort of cot fashioned in the room at 1:45 am. All I can think is how awkward! My roommate is going to arrive, potentially, around 3:00 am and where should she find me sleeping?
Do I take the bed, making it quite unfortunate when our alarm goes off at 6:30 am (3:30 am west coast time) and we debate who will shower first? Please remind yourself, I do not know the other lady I am being asked to sleep with. Or do I sacrifice my own well being for a stranger and sleep on the cot making her feel extremely guilty in the morning due to the fact that I am so polite? And if I take the bed and she explains this fact to other colleagues, what will they think? Will they say, “That girl is looking out for her own sleep comfort, right on!” Or will they think, “That is so selfish! Who takes the bed from a weary traveler?” I reason with myself and come to terms that, ineviatably, I will have to take the cot.
Then the REAL solution hits us. Pfizer has a very strict policy on no roommate changes. Barbaric, I know.
“Max, Max,” we beg, “please, put us together! We are family, we have shared beds and rooms our whole lives. Please, do the right thing, make the switch. The weary travelers will probably show up here later tonight (really this morning, it is AM afterall) together and they will be able to fight it out amongst themselves.”
Max looks around hesitantly, “Girls, there is a very strict no roommate change policy, I could get in big trouble for this.”
Us, “PULLLLEASE! No one will know!”
Max conceded and we skipped merrily to our king size bed. We are thrilled with our salesmanship! But this whole scenario makes me ask myself, why did this situation occur? Why should two adult strangers be asked to share rooms without 2 REAL beds?

Blog HELP! ;

2009-10-15T20:05:00.000-07:00

I need help. If you are following our blog, how do I find yours? And how do I make a link so if I am following someone's blog, they can find mine?

Thank so much!

For the blog reading family members on the other side of the country who read this and, thankfully, finally identified themselves before I said something REALLY inappropriate and offensive, this blogs for you! ;

2009-10-15T18:15:00.000-07:00

Please play the Bud radio ad music as you read that title in your head, those crack me up. Personal favorite was the ode to the coffee barista. “You have the balls to put out a tip jar after charging 4 dollars for a cup of coffee. Thanks a latte barista, this Buds for you!
Does anyone else loose HOURS of their life to brickbreaker, ya know, the crackberry game? Seriously, hours of my life have been spent hitting that ball into bricks.
I finally “beat” brick breaker, meaning I made it through all 34 levels. And do you know what happened? NOTHING! No little men playing instruments like in tetris, no fireworks and sorry your princess is in another castle like in Mario, no awards ceremony like in Mario Kart. The game just starts itself over. You go back to level 1 and start going through it again. I am not sure I have ever has such an unsatisfying “win” in my entire life. I love to win.

I have completely redeemed myself after the gnocchi faux pas! I made some delicious tri tip into tacos with my amazing crock-pot! I simply dropped a bunch of seasonings, onion, beef broth and tri tip into the crock-pot, in the morning while applying mascara and nylons, and when I returned home from work dinner had prepared itself! Incredible!

Here’s the recipe:
Tri tip
1 Onion
Enough Pappy’s Meat Seasoning that you are concerned you should wash the tri tip off because you have definitely applied too much seasoning
3 glug-glugs out of the box of Swanson’s LOW SODIUM beef broth. Low sodium is important because you already added too much sodium with the abundance of Pappys.

We made tacos with the tri tip. Bryan ate 6 tacos. I would like to say this happened because of my delicious cooking, but in honesty, he is a human garbage disposal. He probably would have eaten the gnocchi had I let him.

Wretched gnocchi, I'm gonna be sick!

2009-10-12T19:11:00.000-07:00

I LOVE gnocchi, at Oggie’s in Fresno. I hate gnocchi from my kitchen in Seattle. Cheesy- white-trash-potato-dumplings, sick. And so the story begins….

I am chatting away with Litman today (as Sofie was magically blogging, weird, I know) and we are discussing that although we have been married only a month we have run out of interesting dinner ideas! My mom always made different delicious din-dins, I try but seem to be on repeat. And- side note- I would like to take this opportunity to say thank you and apologize to my Mom! Mom, I am sorry for all the nights I said, “Ick, mustard chicken, again?” or cried that I hated meatloaf (unless she let me share it off her plate). I was wrong. I am sorry. Please send me the nasty mustard chicken recipe, I am begging you…

So anyways, the Litmans had their rehearsal dinner at this amazing Italian restaurant in Fresno. I typically don’t really care for Italian food, but this place was A-MAZ-ING! The gnocchi was a bite of heaven! So today while I am driving and chit-chatting away, I tell Amy I am going to make Bryan and myself some gnocchi. I had downloaded a recipe off the food network and I felt mentally prepared to try it out.

Another side note, Bryan and I are trying to save some money and have decided too much of our budget goes to food and drink. I love drink. So we now have been going to the grocery store once a week and trying to plan out a menu. It seems to be working, we are definitely wasting less food and it is kind of fun when you get desperately creative. We have been going to the grocery store on Tuesday. I just decided to make the gnocchi yesterday (Sunday), largely impart because I bought 20 frickin lbs of potatoes last Tuesday solely because they were on sale for 10 lbs for $0.99, I barely like potatoes. And even if I did, 20 lbs of potatoes! Come on! Bryan loves mashed potatoes, but personally I could take ‘em or leave ‘em. So because it is Monday and all that is left in this house is some cheese, spinach, onions, spices, a can of tomato soup and 15 frickin lbs of potatoes, I set out to try to make some gnocchi AND a sauce….

Here are the ingredients for the gnocchi:

• Kosher salt

• 1 pound russet potatoes

• 3 to 4 large egg yolks

• 1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan

• 1/4 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg

• 1/2 teaspoon gray salt

• 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

• 1 cup all-purpose flour, plus more for dusting board and dough

I didn’t have any parmesan so I figured, “What the heck, I’ll substitute mozzarella.” Ick. Big mistake. My gnocchi looked just fine during all the steps. Pretty even

They Float! That’s what is supposed to happen!

But unfortunately they taste like soggy-cheese-white trash dumplings!

Now let me tell you about my sauce, also something from a trailer park. I goggled a recipe for tomato gorgonzola sauce. Now I am sure you are thinking, “wow! This girl has gorgonzola cheese in her fridge! Not too shabby.” Well, let me set you straight, I don’t! My plan was again to substitute mozzarella. Sick. So the sauce called for these tasty ingredients:

• 1 Tbsp. olive oil

• 1/2 cup onion, diced

• 1/4 tsp. red pepper flakes

• 1/4 tsp. ground black pepper

• 1 Tbsp. tomato paste

• 1 clove garlic, minced

• 1 (28 oz) can tomato puree

• 2 tsp. balsamic vinegar

• 2 tsp. sugar

• 1/2 cup heavy cream

• 1/3 cup creamy Gorgonzola, crumbled

• 1/3 cup fresh basil, chopped

• salt to taste

The sauce I created included these, sometimes tasty but not in my made up recipe, ingredients:

• 1 can Campbell’s tomato soup

• 1 onion

• A bunch of spinach, I like to add spinach to everything and trick myself into eating it

• Red pepper flakes

• Oregano

• Basil

• Balsamic vinegar

• All spice

• Salt and Pepper

• And unfortunately, more mozzarella cheese

It doesn’t look too bad, but mostly it just tastes like melted cheese and tomato soup with a kick!

And here is the final result, again it looks pretty tasty, don’t be fooled! It tastes more like Chef Boyardee than Top Chef!!

Poor Bryan! Can you believe what I tried to serve us? All that mozzarella cheese. Wretched and Disgusting. I am gonna be sick! Looks like we are going to eating PB&J again!

Sof's Awesome Adventure!

2009-10-12T15:02:00.000-07:00

Today 'mom' decided to take me to work. I think I am in trouble because the people moved the big dinner table and found my secret potty spot! Dang! Busted! I just prefer to do my business in private, under the table in the corner, not out in the open where all the neighbors can see!

Or, come to think of it, perhaps it was the mischief I made while 'mom' was in the shower that got me in trouble. For whatever reason, 'mom' doesn't seem to like it when I decorate the house with toilet paper! Doesn't she understand I'm doing it FOR her, as a gift? Really, I just don't know what comes over me, the minute the people turn their backs its like that roll of fun is calling to me, "Pull me Sof, you know you want to! You can shred me up into teeney bits and get all tangled up!" It was real fun, that is until I saw the look on 'mom's face... Ruff!

I really don't mind going to work with her. Sure I don't get as much rest as I'd typically like, but it's pretty fun to sit on her lap and listen to her gossip on the phone. Juicy!

So today we got to go on a long drive out to an island. 'Mom' saw some drs and I napped. The best part was the ferry terminal and ride back to home! There were so many smells!

And it was really windy!

Then we got on the ferry and the view was fantastic!

When we got off the ferry some idiot smoking a cigarette nearly hit us with his car! Can you believe it!? Its a good thing 'mom' is an excellent defensive driver!

Yo 'dad', if you're reading this, can you get me a freakin haircut already! Its gettin hard to play fetch with my AFLAC duck, let alone drive, cause I can barely see! Thanks.

All right, I'm out, it's hard to type with paws!

Birthday!

2009-10-11T20:37:00.000-07:00

So for my birthday this year I REALLY wanted to go to Chicago and San Diego. Bryan shot those dreams down, something about the money we spent at our wedding and the holidays coming?? Drat. So, I decided I REALLY wanted to go to the Vancouver Aquarium. I just love aquariums. I think, if I do some psychoanalysis, it stems back to my childhood... When I was about ten my Mom and Gram were taking us to the Monterey aquarium. Kelly and Kourt were fighting and Mom and Gram kept telling them to stop or we were going to turn around. They didn't stop and we DID turn around. I'm scarred. It's a good thing this was most of my traumatic memories and my obsession is aquariums!

The Vancouver Aquarium is fantastic! There are Beluga whales and a baby beluga too!

After the Aquarium we zipped around Stanley park for a bit and then went to dinner at this fantastic french restaurant, La Brasserie. It came highly recommended to us by a random man on the street.

And of course, we had a fun night out with friends here in Seattle. We went to a bar that is called Fierbend, or something like that. But I call it the DAS BOOT bar! They have this giant glass boot that you share with a group. Once you start drinking it you can't put it down and everyone yells DAS BOOT!

Thank you to everyone who helped make my birthday so fun!

Tricked!

2009-10-04T20:03:00.000-07:00

Bryan likes to play on a softball team. Bryan would probably also like it if I went to watch, or gasp! even play, occassionally... Unfortunately he didn't luck out with that kind of loving supportive wife, ha! I like to DO most activities together. Skiing, jogging, crossfit, and my personal fav grocery shopping together. But I haven't played softball, by choice anyways, in my life and I'm not about to take playing or watching it up now!

So he had a game at "3" today down by greenlake. I love to walk greenlake and its a nice day, so the manipulator asks if I want to go down and walk Sof while he plays. The midget and I go for an hour walk and come over to the field where I expect to find Bryan wrappin it up and suggesting a cold beer! Delish!

But no! Its only the top of the second inning! Are you kidding me? Clearly Sofie and I were tricked, its 4 and the game started at "3". Right. We spent the next hour being terrorized by these kids, Tempress and Connie. Seriously. Connie kept saying she was 'training' Sofie, really she was just pulling poor midget's limbs and smashing her face in to the cement while suggesting, with an endearing lisp, "shit down shofie! Shand up shofie!" All the while I kept suggesting to little Connie and Tempress that they might consider a more gentle approach to training... You may be asking yourself, where was the mother of these sweet cherubs? I sure as hell was! It turns out Connie and Tempress have an equally endearing brother, Stewie! Unfortunately for Sof, puppies weren't Stewie's gig! No no, little Stewie was bringing lady bugs and rollie pollies over to his mom and sisters and saying quite innocently, "look its a little bug!" Then Stewie would drop the little bugs and stomp on them several times! Oh Connie, Tempress, and Stewie...

So on the up and up Bryan was super excited that I was there to see him hit a home run! The team won! And I have a new found love for recreational coed softball

Yay! Sissy got a blog too!

2009-10-03T14:15:00.001-07:00

www.kellyanddanielfolmer.blogspot.com

Isn't it so cute!

New Blogs!

2009-10-02T21:07:00.000-07:00

I made Heather and Amy start!

http://www.manymoyerstogether.blogspot.com/
http://www.amyanddavidlitman.blogspot.com/

So fun!

The great communicator and a brain tumor the size of a melon!

2009-09-30T22:15:00.000-07:00

So I broke my cell phone, shocker! I go through cell phones at a somewhat alarming rate, I'm rough on stuff. I also LIVE on my cell phone. It's like my arm, my leg, or perhaps even a boob... Important to me! Here's the story:

A few things happen when you cook a lot. 1. You eat tasty meals, snacks, and ice cream 2. You become a fat wife 3. You do a TON of dishes! And it is in #3 we the solve the mystery of the death of my cell phone. Some water got splashed on it and it drowned. Very very sad.

Now because I am rough on things I have phone insurance. So yesterday Bryan and I took ourselves down to Verizon to cash in my insurance policy. You would think the people at Verizon would try to be helpful, I have done some rough calculations and estimate that in a decade of cell service I have probably spent nearly 10k (holy shit), but alas. The college dropout standing behind the counter had no interest in being useful and continued to play spider solitaire as I suffered a mini panic attack because the Verizon twit on the phone was telling us that the Blackberry Pearl was out of stock and I would not be receiving my replacement until one became available, hopefully within 2 weeks. Excuse me?! Hold the phone! I can NOT be phoneless for 24 hours, let alone weeks!!! I wouldn't function, my people wouldn't function. ;-)

At this point the college dropout has finally ceased playing his game and is looking at me like I am a psychotic b%&*$ . Enter our story's Hero, The Great Communicator, as I am melting down Bryan takes control and tells the evil phone insurance lady that we can't be without a cell phone. They talk for a few minutes and before you know it, I have a new upgraded crackberry! YAY! My hero!

Thankfully, the phone arrived today. It was a hard 24 hours for many of us, I know you all suffered as I was not available to take calls. But I am now back and functional and excited to chit-chat, gossip, and solve the world's most serious problems with you all tomorrow!

Fat Wife.

2009-09-28T20:41:00.000-07:00

Ok! So this is my first real blog... dun dun dun!

We are making ice cream. mmmm! Delicious. Here is the recipe:
Gram's Vanilla Ice Cream- Makes 1 Qt

1 pint of whipping cream

1 pint of half and half

3 eggs

1 1/2 cups sugar

1 teaspoon of lemon juice

dash of salt

1 teaspoon of vanilla

Rock salt.

Beat eggs and flavorings. Add sugar and beat well.

Add whipping cream and half and half. Mix well.

Pour mixture into chilled container.

Follow machine directions

Now that I have mentioned the recipe, mostly because my sweet friend Kelsey (who helped/coerced me into making this blog) will like it, I can get on to what I want to blog about. The sarcastic stuff.

Before we got married 3 weeks ago I was fanatical. I'm talkin' scary dedicated to the cause of wedding weight loss. I was on my favorite diet, the 'latte for breakfast-sensible lunch- glass of wine for dinner' diet. Very effective! Post wedding, I have been severely less dedicated (which is probably good because although the previous mentioned diet is effective it is NOT healthy and may leave one feeling lethargic and a bit bitchy ;-))

Now here we are 3 weeks after the wedding and I am on the other extreme. When it comes to food I say when, I say where and I say how much!

Amy, one of my very best friends, married David 6 days after Bryan and I got married. We have coined the phrase Fat Wife! Fat Wife is the newly married lady who consumes what she wants when she wants nearly all the time. Last night I enjoyed fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and gravy! Also brussell sprouts, which I love! Fat wife.

So tonight I am going to enjoy my Gram's yummy home made ice cream! And maybe tomorrow I'll go for a jog...

2009-09-28T16:49:00.001-07:00

The fact that I can blog from my phone makes this much more appealing! I love anything I can do from my phone...

2009-09-28T15:00:00.001-07:00

I just wanted to see if I could post from my phone... I'm learning!

HI!

2009-09-27T23:01:00.000-07:00

Okay! So I am starting our blog over... Lets see if I do it this time :)