Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Sales school and we live in filth!

Last week Bryan and I were watching the season finale of The Biggest Loser at 9:30 pm when we received a knock on our door. Bryan is the president of our HOA and this neighborhood has some issues, to put it mildly, so I figured it was going to be one of our neighbors coming over to complain and spread the spirit of this joyous season. AKA, I made him get up and answer the door. I was wrong... it was actually two young ladies inquiring as to whether the "lady of the house" would like HER carpets cleaned and stairs vacuumed for "FREE", this will only take 10 minutes they promised. Well, yes! The "lady of the house" would LOVE the carpets cleaned and stairs vacuumed for free! Please, please, do come in!

Shoot. We should have known this was too good to be true!! In walked two young men, Camron and RJ, ready to clean our carpets and sell us a Kirby! Camron came upstairs with us and began demonstrating the Kirby. He vacuumed our whole room, and as he cleaned he showed us what he was vacuuming up with his little demo circles. Disgusting filth...

He asked us how regularly we vacuum and we had to admit, as we cracked up, that our vacuuming was infrequent at best. Camron exclaimed, "Why would you!?" Your vacuum wouldn't work this well, it would be a waste of time...." Sure Camron, that’s why I choose not to vacuum more frequently, it's because my vacuum doesn't work that well. It surely has nothing to do with the fact that vacuuming is one of my least favorite household chores!
While Camron cleaned away he kept checking in, trial closing us, and trying to seal the deal. He was very aggressive, and yet for some reason, we didn't mind this stranger cleaning our home while we sat watching and drinking our beers. Bryan did an excellent job throwing objection after objection so that Camron would continue to demonstrate the functionality of the Kirby. All said and done, Camron vacuumed and shampooed my entire upstairs and stair case, cleaned our mattress making it free of dust-mites, the hardwoods were cleaned and polished in the kitchen, AND I was offered a massage by Camron and his Kirby.
While this was going on I giggled and looked to Bryan, my big strong man, to make a decision. When Camron pulled out the paperwork and tried to get Bryan to sign, I hid in the kitchen, unable to say "no". Bryan made fun of me that if he hadn't been there, I probably would have purchased 2 Kirbys. 2 is certainly an exaggeration, 1 is closer to the truth.
So at midnight, after some very impressive selling, we finally got the poor sad salesmen out of our clean home. They tried to close us by talking the Kirby and our health, overall cost of home ownership, the ability to use the Kirby in all sorts of functions, guilt over Camron winning a cruise.... All of which were quite compelling reasons to purchase! So as they were leaving, all 4 of us were a bit baffled as to why we didn't purchase this amazing Kirby. They did everything right. We see all the VALUE in owning a Kirby. We see the NEED. We believe in its BENEFITS over the competitors. The answer, we just didn’t wake up thinking, "today is the day we are gonna blow 1500 smackers on a vacuum!"


  1. wow. Wow. I cannot believe you let them into your home! Haha, I am glad you resisted and glad you got a clean house out of the ordeal!

  2. from what I have seen if you buy a kirby for $1000 the salesman makes a $60 commission. if over $1000 they make the $60 plus the remainder... my advice. buy it for $1001!